Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Finale Results!

Ugh. I’m really kind of dreading this. We should have another week of competition. And I really don’t want to watch tonight precisely because of the mile-long list of guest stars Cat rattled off last night. Jennifer Lopez and Adam Lambert? Bring on the dancers, please. Just FYI, don’t expect comments here on non-dancing.

Well, we have another super dramatic introduction. Yeah, we couldn’t have pieced together that you all want to win. We needed you to sit in darkened rooms and tell us.

Powerful opening number, with the top 18, which doesn’t make sense…didn’t we start with 20?

Cat’s looking classy tonight. Took her all season, but she finally put an outfit together.

Lil C, Tyce and Debbie Allen join the panel for the evening. Love Debbie, Tyce is tolerable, Lil C tends to be a jerk who doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Just so you’re all caught up.

Not sure what’s going on. It would appear that Kevin, Legacy and Russell are doing a hip hop piece together. My mom tells me it’s from the introductory show, which I missed. Thank you, political science. There’s a lot of good stuff here, although a couple of the stunts are a bit awkward.

Oh, OK. Each judge is picking their favorite routine to be recreated. That was Lil C’s.

Adam’s pick: Tore My Heart with Ellenore and Jakob, choreographed by Sonya. Was also my favorite Sonya piece this season (see Sunday’s post).

Nigel’s pick: Derek Graham’s tap piece with Peter, Philip and Bianca, which I also missed the first time around. Gosh, that was awesome. I can’t believe I haven’t tapped in 4 years.

Mary’s pick: Ashleigh and Ryan in a self-choreographed jive. Totally new, not previously performed. He really is a better dancer with her.

Pause for Leona Lewis. If you ask me, they should get her to sing Bleeding Love and bring Mark and Chelsie back to perform. But, no one asked me.

Nigel’s pick (really? Again?): At this Moment with Kathryn and Jakob, choreographed by Dwight and Desmond

Tyce’s pick: Nathan and Mollee’s Bollywood, choreographed by Nakul
87 technical difficulties, some missed cues, and an injury later, the top 6 comes on stage for some eliminations, 47 minutes in.

6th place: Ryan. CALLED IT.

Whole bunch of guest stars and promos…

5th place: Ashleigh. This finale may suck, but at least I still have my magic touch.

Adam’s next pick: Ellenore and Legacy’s contemporary by Travis

Debbie’s pick: African Jazz with Noelle and Russell, choreographed by Sean (video clip tonight, since Russell’s not really up for an encore. Poor kid.)

4th place: Ellenore. I’m starting to freak myself out with my sheer brilliance. I will officially be OK with any of the top 3 winning.

Lil C’s next pick: Ariana, Channing, Jakob and Nathan with their original contemporary piece

Mary’s next pick: Russell’s and Kathryn’s hip hop from last night.

Nigel’s final pick: The final “style” piece, featuring the top 20 and choreographed by Wade and Amanda

3rd place: Kathryn

Jennifer Lopez fails at lip synching.

AAAAAAND THE WINNER IS….

Russell. Not surprised, but very pleased. Very. He so deserves it.

And there ends this blog. Wasn’t this fun? Filling my Tuesdays and Wednesdays will be a chore from now on, and I think I need something new to blog about. Make suggestions!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Finale Part 1: Top 6 Competition

I still say this isn’t right-the whole “top 6 finale” situation. My mom and I talked about it today and they’re really doing a lot differently than they have in the past and I don’t really like it. If it’s because of the format, I’d really rather they switch back to summer.

But anyways. Like it or not, here we are at the finale competition. I have NO idea how they’re formatting this, so I am very much “winging” (as Steve would say) this blog.

I see we’re taking the dramatic approach, with ridiculous music playing as we watch the finalists file out of their dressing rooms and onto the stage. Cheesy.

Cat didn’t do her hair again. Figures, since she’s wearing a halfway decent dress. And Adam feeds the madness by telling her she looks beautiful. No.

I think everyone’s dancing with everyone else (If Wikipedia is to be believed).

Also, my mom said Mary cries a lot tonight. I shall keep count.

Couple One: Ryan and Kathryn (You know their styles by now, right?)
Samba with Jason
Well, that was…awkward. I loved the choreography and I totally see where Jason was going with that, but she definitely kicked him at least twice. The footwork was great from both of them, and I agree with Nigel but she definitely looked like a ballroom dancer. But the stunts at the beginning and the end were just awkward. Meh, the judges like it. And it wasn’t awful, but…it also wasn’t great. The shirtlessness was, even though it was Ryan.

Couple Two: Ellenore and Jakob
Broadway with Tyce
Well, this was certainly better than the Samba. It started off wonderfully and dropped off a bit in the middle, but picked back up at the end. What they were really good at was accentuating the right beats in the music, even if it was just with their eyes. I loved the choreography, but disagree with Nigel in that I wish they hadn’t been doing so many tricks, especially with her battements. I think she did about twelve on her right side and only one on her left. I mean, she did them all well, but it got a bit boring. They did look really phenomenal though, and performed it well.

Couple Three: Ashleigh and Russell
Lyrical Jazz with Sonya
Sonya choreographed this? Really? I’m surprised. It was great, just not really her style at all. And yep, I wrote down that Russell completely outshone her even before Nigel started going on about it. That boy can leap! For a krumper, he is absolutely incredible. Those jumps he was doing took me about a decade to learn – I’m truly floored. And Ashleigh was fine, but she really may as well not have even better. The lifts at the end were definitely great as well. Also, more shirtless boys. Always OK.

FYI, Mary’s crying. This makes one.

Couple Four: Ellenore and Ryan
Jazz with Garry
I loved this! I wasn’t sure at first; I knew it was interesting to say the least but it definitely was awesome. Yeah, yeah, technicalities, whatever. The choreography was awesome and it was well-executed and I adored it. They were also incredibly in-sync, which was obviously vital and much more important here than stretching your legs and moving your head. Great job from both.

Couple Five: Ashleigh and Jakob
Foxtrot with Jean-Marc
This was great too! First of all, I loved her dress, but I’m sure you all put that together already. It really accentuated her kicks and spins and it was perfect. The two of them really looked like they were just having a great time and not thinking about the steps at all (in the good way). I was glad to see her getting some attention after she sort of faded in her piece with Russell. Their footwork looked flawless to me, too. Loved this.

Couple Six: Ellenore and Russell
Paso Doble with Jason
Wow. This was the second great Paso Doble we’ve seen this season. Technically perfect, no, but definitely above acceptable. I actually thought they both had great intensity and “fire and passion,” but Ellenore’s came out in facials and Russell’s came out in movement. At one part their arms were different when they definitely should have been in sync, but that’s forgivable. And the visuals were great, as they always are with Paso Dobles.

Couple Seven: Kathryn and Jakob
Contemporary with Dwight and Desmond
Oh my goodness. If this isn’t one that makes Mary cry I will be SHOCKED, and that may or may not be because I am in tears right now. Standing ovation. Good. That was freaking incredible. Both of their extensions were gorgeous, and they had the perfect balance between being sharp and being flowy. And I think they’re both made of rubber. And wow. I’m just speechless at how amazing that was.

And yes, tears from Mary. Forgivable.

Couple Eight: Ashleigh and Ryan (oh dear)
Contemporary with Travis
OK, I know I’ve been dreading this moment all season, but fine, they have chemistry, OK? They looked so stinking happy up there. Ick. The dancing was all fine and good, though not my favorite Travis piece. And, none of you will believe this is coming out of my mouth (fingers?) but her dress was a little too pink. I mean, it was like neon. And this was not a neon piece. Anyway, whatever. I guess I’m a little impressed or something.

Tears from Mary. This makes 3.

Couple Nine: Kathryn and Russell
Hip Hop with Tabitha and Napoleon (really? We almost went a whole episode without them.)
At least it’s not “emotional” hip hop. No really, I thought this was pretty great. I was totally stunned when SHE started flipping over him. That’s totally his thing and she was doing it so well! She totally held her own and they were absolutely marvelous. I will officially not be disappointed if he wins tomorrow

Well, you all know my predictions. They haven’t changed since Sunday. Tomorrow, I’ll be watching the finale with my mom and maybe Ally. Again, really, pray for no plane delays. I’m scheduled to land at 3:55 which gives me 3 hours to get home – we should be good 

And with that, I should probably start packing. See y’all tomorrow for the final blog of the season.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Pre-Finale Special!

Welcome to the pre-finale special! In here, we’ll remember each of our final 6 dancer’s best performance of the season, as well as the best piece from most of the choreographers. We’ll also find out who’s spent the most time in the dreaded bottom group of dancers. I know, you’re excited, so let’s roll!

Each dancer’s best piece
I didn’t spend much time sorting through for these, and I think it makes sense that all of their best routines came in week 5 or later. All of the dancers this season (except Ryan) showed great progress and development. Also, it’s no coincidence that Sonya choreographed half of these. I think it says a lot-she can make any dancer look good. She definitely caters to their technique without compromising her own style.

Ashleigh: Week 5, lyrical jazz with Jakob, choreographed by Sonya

Ryan: Week 7, cha cha with Kathryn, choreographed by Jason

Ellenore: Week 7, contemporary with Legacy, choreographed by Travis

Jakob: Week 6, contemporary with Ellenore, choreographed by Sonya

Kathryn, Week 5, jazz with Legacy, choreographed by Sonya

Russell, Week 6, jive with Mollee, choreographed by Anya and Pasha

Of course each dancer had more great dances than just these, but I find it interesting that 4 of the 6 come from the same or similar genres (contemporary, jazz, lyrical jazz) and only two are ballroom. Krumper Russell shone in a jive piece and ballroom dancer Ashleigh performed best in lyrical jazz. You really do have to be versatile for this competition.

Each choreographer’s best piece

Not every choreographer is listed here because, well, if they didn’t choreograph any great dances, they shouldn’t get recognized for mediocrity (I'm looking at you, Mandy Moore). Luckily, almost everyone who choreographed more than one piece gets a mention. Tony Meredith you’ll find twice: once for his partnership with Melanie LaPatin and once for a piece of his own. Props to Travis, Sonya and Tony and Melanie for having 3 pieces worth considering and to Jason for having two. Here are the final results:

Tyce Diorio: Week 4, jazz, Blackbird, Channing and Victor

Dave Scott: Week 1, hip hop, On and On, Kathryn and Legacy

Doriana Sanchez: Week 1, disco, Turn the Beat Around, Nathan and Mollee

Jamal Sims: Week 2, hip hop, Move Shake Drop, Russell and Noelle

Nakul Dev Mahajan: Week 7, Bollywood, Spirit of Rangeela, Russell and Ashleigh

Stacey Tookey: Week 2, contemporary, 2 Steps Away, Kathryn and Legacy

Miriam Larici and Leonardo Barrionuevo: Week 2, Argentine tango, Violentango, Ryan and Ellenore

JT Thomas and Tomas Mielnicki: Week 3, quickstep, Hey Baby!, Pauline and Peter

Andy Blankenbuehler: Week 3, Broadway, I Wanna Be Like You, Kathryn and Legacy

Sean Cheesman: Week 3, African jazz, Frog Dance, Russell and Noelle

Tabitha and Napoleon D’umo: Week 4, hip hop, Whatcha Say, Ashleigh and Jakob

Edward Simon: Week 4, foxtrot, Baby, Russell and Noelle

Tony Meredith: Week 4, Paso Doble, Pursuit, Kathryn and Legacy

Jean-Marc Généreux and France Mousseau: Week 5, Viennese Waltz, Your Guardian Angel, Kathryn and Legacy

Spencer Liff: Week 6, Broadway, Choreography, Nathan and Kathryn

Anya Garnis and Pasha Kovalev: Week 6, jive, Land of 1000 Dances, Mollee and Russell

Joey Dowling: Week 7, Broadway, Easy Street, Mollee and Jakob

Jason Gilkison: Week 7, Viennese Waltz, Ordinary Day, Mollee and Jakob

Travis Wall: Week 4, contemporary, Your Ex-Lover is Dead, Ryan and Ellenore

Tony Meredith and Melanie La Patin: Week 5, quickstep, Four Brothers, Ellenore and Jakob

Sonya Tayeh: Top Ten, contemporary, Tore My Heart, Ellenore and Jakob

And of course, the information you’ve been waiting for…

Our dear Ryan has been in the bottom four times. That’s more than half the time. Seriously, who’s still voting for him? Ellenore is right behind him with three times in the bottom, which doesn’t surprise me since she’s fairly hot and cold. Kathryn has been in the bottom once, and each of our other finalists have avoided the bottom altogether. Impressive.

So, my predictions going into the finale? I’m not too sure how they’re formatting it this season with the top 6, but I’d guess Ryan and Ashleigh go out first, followed by Ellenore and Jakob (keep in mind, this is what I think will happen, not what I want to happen.) I suspect Russell will win it all, with Kathryn being the top girl.

Of course, this all depends on how everyone performs Tuesday (or does it?) So remember to tune in. Also, it’s one hour Tuesday and two hours Wednesday this week. Plan accordingly.

See you soon!

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Top Eight Results

In a feat of perfect timing, I got home from an outing with my best friend, turned on the TV, and they were just starting the opening piece! Whose choreographer I guessed correctly, which, as my mom said, wasn’t that hard. But still.

Hey, Cat’s wearing a semi-decent outfit! It’s about time.

Starting out with the guys tonight.

Russell’s safe, in spite of Shane’s awful assistant. Thank goodness-he was really awesome and I’d hate for Ashleigh’s injury to stop him.

Legacy’s in danger. I blame Tabitha and Napoleon. Man, listen to those angry teenage girls. They are not happy.

Jakob is safe. Thank goodness. I would have been truly shocked if that had gone the other way. Ryan is awful. And surely more people voted for Legacy, right? RIGHT?

Mary’s voice is unusually loud tonight. I don’t even think she knows she’s shouting.

Girls!

Kathryn’s safe, which kind of surprises me. She’s the one I never really notice all along, which was Jeanine last season, so it could work to her advantage. Or maybe everyone else has noticed her. Whatever.

Ellenore’s in danger! Wooo! I was afraid that the Travis piece and the fact that she’s a favorite would work in her favor but maybe not! (Also, maybe all of those angry brats in the audience should have VOTED if they loved Ellenore and Legacy so much.)

Ashleigh’s safe. That’s weird. Huh. Hopefully Mollee ends up safe.

Ryan falls to his knees, presumably thanking God or whoever. I really hope he goes home.

There just aren’t enough words to mock this Asian “pop group sensation.” And usually mocking is what I do best.

They’re auditioning for season 7 in January? Does this mean they’re going back to the summer format? That could pose a problem if I’m in not here when it starts. And, as we all know, the world revolves around me.

Some dancers came out with different solos…Not sure about Legacy’s and Ellenore’s, but Ryan’s was definitely the same and Mollee’s was definitely different.

Hey, Kris Allen! That guy who won American Idol…but no one remembers because of the Adam Lambert scandal. Lame.

Uh-oh. Ellenore’s going to the finale. My mom will not be pleased.

CRAP. What is wrong with people? Ryan’s safe too. Now I’m not pleased. This is not OK.

Ugh.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Top Eight Competition

I know I say this every week, but are we seriously at the top 8 already? How does that even happen? The finale’s next week. Which is weird, because it’s always been the top 4. I’m confused and totally not sure how this will work, but whatever. This whole season has seemed really rushed, with no results shows for two weeks (not that I’m complaining about dancing!) and now one week fewer of competition.

According to TV guide, Adam Lambert is performing on the finale next Wednesday (which I’ll be home for! Pray for no airline delays please!) Hmmm.

Aw, crap. Ashleigh’s in a sling. Shoulder popped, and she put it back in herself (it’s possible. Trust me.) Doctors didn’t clear her for competition (the injury just happened this morning) but she should be back next week-should America vote for her. Poor girl.

As for the dancing, each couple gets one song remixed for them this week…not sure why.

Couple One: Contemporary/lyrical dancer Kathryn and ballroom dancer Ryan
Disco with Doriana
Hmm. I’m not terribly impressed. First of all, Last Dance should be sung by Donna Summer and only Donna Summer. Yes, they look great. But you could see her nerves, and she wasn’t fearless enough with a lot of the stunts. On top of that, every time he had to lift her he stumbled a little as if she’s an elephant. And he’s a ballroom dancer so no excuses about upper body strength. But Adam and Mary loved it and are throwing around words like “perfect,” so once again, what do I know? Nigel agrees with me. HAH. I think my perception is skewed by Nathan and Mollee’s routine in week one.

Couple Two: jazz dancer Mollee and contemporary dancer Jakob
Viennese Waltz with Jason
First of all, the music. I hadn’t heard this song (Ordinary Day, Vanessa Carlton) in YEARS. Until yesterday…when it came up on my Pandora station. And then this. Wow. Anyways, the dancing was really great. Mollee’s extensions were incredible and were only accentuated by that amazing skirt. I want one. I thought he was a bit awkward on the turns where they were holding hands, which seemed odd since they’re almost the same height when she’s in heels. But it was otherwise flawless. His leaps and butterflies were absolutely brilliant.

Ashleigh’s non-solo: Poor thing. She really wants to dance.

Couple Three: jazz dancer Ellenore and b-boy Legacy
Contemporary with Travis
Have I mentioned how much I am in love with Travis lately? No? Well, it’s true. He’s done it again. It was like nothing he’s done before yet just as brilliant. Wow. And, Ellenore always gets to dance with him. Lucky. The choreography was…abusive. It’s a wonder it wasn’t one of these two who got injured in practice. And between Ellenore’s extension and Legacy’s flip over the table, I was speechless. That should have been physically impossible. That was…intense. Loved it. And Nigel’s already talking Emmys. Loved Travis’s face when he said that.

Jakob’s solo: Well, he did as good as can be expected for someone who has to follow Travis’s choreography. No, it was really good, except for the outfit. Which may be enough to discourage everyone from voting for him.

Couple Four: Krumper Russell and Latin ballroom dancer Ashleigh (injured, filling in is Shane’s assistant Rachel)
Hip-hop with Shane
First of all, SHANE!!! We’ve missed you. Beyond that, I hate critiquing dances with substitutes. And Shane’s assistant Rachel isn’t very good. I would have loved to see Ashleigh in this because I think she could have rocked it. Luckily, this was totally up Russell’s ally and there wasn’t much partnering, so most of the time Rachel wasn’t even in the shots. He was great.

Sidenote: As usual, Nigel is promising everyone they’ll get through

Mollee’s solo: Fairly typical choreography but a bit more mature than we’ve seen from her in the past. Good thing.

Couple One: Contemporary/lyrical dancer Kathryn and ballroom dancer Ryan
ChaCha with Jason
Yall know my stance on repeat choreographers by now, right? Especially with the numbers of contestants shrinking. Anyways, overall I thought this was incredible. So was her corset thing. But, yes, dancing good. Better than good. One thing I noticed is how much more flexible Kathryn’s right side is than her left. But that doesn’t really matter. Her back flexibility was awesome and the ending was phenomenal. And out of nowhere. The downside: the hot tamale train seems to be back. Really, Mary?

Legacy’s solo: Awesome, as usual. Makes my head hurt.

Ellenore’s solo: just the usual. A bit sloppy at parts. Not great.

Russell’s solo: haha, he’s Santa. I’m so easily amused. And he bounces back from stupid mistakes (like not tying his shoes tight enough. Really?)

Couple Two: jazz dancer Mollee and contemporary dancer Jakob
Broadway with Joey
Maybe it’s my infatuation with all things Annie, but I thought this was brilliant. The costuming was positively brilliant, right down to Mollee’s hair. Doesn’t even look like her! And it all fits the period so well. And the dancing was awesome to match! Perfectly synchronized!

Kathryn’s solo: Wow, it’s like her legs are made of spaghetti. In a good way.

Couple Three: jazz dancer Ellenore and b-boy Legacy
Hip Hop with Tabitha and Napoleon
Why yes, Tabitha, this piece is strange. Legacy totally stole the show, which really shouldn’t come as a surprise, but Ellenore seemed like she was holding back. Plus those tops are completely unflattering. But judges conversing in alien language = totally awesome. But, yeah, not feeling it. Sorry folks.

Ryan’s solo: All things considered, much better than his past solos. I do wish he’d stop incorporating back handsprings and splits into his ballroom routines. And all respect goes down the toilet when he starts crying over his wife. Gah.

Couple Four: Krumper Russell and Latin ballroom dancer Ashleigh (injured, filling in is Nakul’s assistant Alicia)
Bollywood with Nakul
Hey, this assistant can actually dance! The costume makes her look like a mermaid though. For knowing nothing about bollywood, I though Russell was great. It was high-energy and technical and all around really good.

Loove how they showed rehearsal shots of Ashleigh with the numbers at the end. Good call.

So, bottom two guesses?

Ashleigh and Ellenore
Ryan and Jakob. But really, just Ryan.

As for me, I’m in much higher spirits this evening, having turned in my enterprise and knowing I get to go shopping with my best friend tomorrow. Life is good.

Happy voting! See y’all tomorrow night!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Top Ten Results

The opening number was simply fabulous. Cat’s dress is not. Ally texted me an hour ago and said “Ew. Cat is wearing a weird dress.” Actually, she said wierd. But whatever, she was right. Kid’s got style. Cat does not.

Anyway, I guessed the opening choreographer as soon as I heard the opening bars of It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me. Who else but Tyce Diorio? Too easy. I could have done without Ashleigh and Ryan going at it onstage, but whatever. We get it, they’re married. It’s good television (apparently). Let it go.

Here we go…

Yeah, that’s it. Let’s start with Ellenore. The only one I’m completely positive will be safe. Aaaand she is. No duh.

Mollee, looking rather grown up this evening, is also safe. My mom will be pleased.

They must be doing a bottom 2.

Noelle’s in danger, making me one for one.

Kathryn’s joining her, making Ashleigh safe and me wrong. That’s ok, though. This was getting pretty boring, so let’s mix it up a bit.

As for the guys, we’re not wasting any time sending Ryan to the bottom two and cutting straight to…Ashleigh tearing up. GIVE IT UP. I hope he goes home so we don’t have to see their sappy in love garbage anymore. Bitter, me? Nah.

Russell’s safe. Duh.

Look at that, Jakob’s safe too. Wow, this is awfully predictable.

Nathan’s the final guy in danger, which means I went two for four tonight. Not too shabby, or maybe I’m just trying to make myself feel better.

Guest dancers = awesome. Krump isn’t my thing, but if you can do it to classical music and make it work, you’re all right by me. (Mom: youtube it. Seriously.)

Ohhh solos. Noelle should probably learn to extend her knees. I think I’ve come to the root of those injuries.

Ryan, back with the same lame solo from last night. Way to have originality. (Although, wait-Noelle did use the same music. But I think it was different choreography. Or maybe it’s just better.)

I do feel like Kathryn really stepped it up. I wish Mary would stop crying. It’s almost as annoying as when she screams. And oh, good, now Kathryn’s crying. She hasn’t done that in a while. At least they interrupted her before her voice got all high and squeaky like it always did in the beginning.

Nathan was about the same as last night.

No comment on Snoop Dogg.

So, eliminations. The girls go first, and Noelle is a goner. Good thing Adam pretty much promised her work for the rest of her life.

This, obviously, means Kathryn is safe.

And for the guys…Nathan’s gone? NOOO. That ruins my evil plan. You know, the one where everyone I hate gets eliminated. But Nathan? Really? Must have been Mollee keeping him afloat all those weeks.

Argh. Maybe next week something good will happen. Like Ryan going home.

Also by next week, The Paper That Is Ruining My Life will have been turned in. Which means nothing to any of you, but makes me happy, so there.

See you then!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Top Ten Competition

So here we are at the top ten competition, and I still don’t have a clear favorite. I mean, Legacy’s hot, but I don’t have a favorite, y’know, dancer. Highly unusual for me.

To recap the results show I missed last week due to a highly competitive Uno Attack tournament (which I lost, but I’m pretty sure people cheated), the bottom three couples were Karen and Victor, Mollee and Nathan and Ellenore and Ryan. So I got two out of three. Karen and Victor were eliminated. Fine by me.

But back to the present.

Yes, Cat, the winner will use their prize money to buy shoes. You are exactly right.

Also, I’m starting to think that Cat just looks at what Mary’s wearing and tries to copy it in the trashiest way possible.

Couple One: Contemporary dancer Noelle and ballroom dancer Ryan
Hip Hop with Tabitha and Napoleon
The phrase “What is this garbage?” literally just left my mouth and there’s not even anyone else in the room. Of course, the judges loved it. Wow. I can see that Ryan and Noelle know how to have sex in an office, but can they dance? Nope. It was incredibly sloppy and way too awkward to be sexy. And, no, no chemistry. Also, total rip off of the famous “table dance” in season 3 with Sabra and Neil, choreographed by Mandy Moore. Speaking of Mandy, where’s she been? (Whoops, looking back, I see she was here three weeks ago. But when we see some choreographers twice a show [I’m looking at you, Tabitha and Napoleon] three weeks is quite a while).

Couple Two: Latin ballroom dancer Ashleigh and b-boy Legacy
Contemporary with Garry
Let’s see. I don’t know who this Garry fellow is or what his background’s like, so I’ll have to look into that. This certainly wasn’t “contemporary” as we’ve come to know it on the show, but that’s certainly not a knock. I actually really enjoyed the choreography. I did feel like Legacy and Ashleigh especially weren’t quite doing everything full out, particularly the “up” parts. They weren’t afraid to throw themselves onto the ground, but a lot of the extensions and jumps were held back a bit. They did have great expressions and awesome stamina. Great ending. And it sounds like the judges and I are on the same page here.

Wait what? Solos? Oh yeah, they do that now.

All right, sure: Mollee. Holy crap, how does she not split her jeans doing all those splits and walkovers and crap? I’m impressed.

Russell: I feel really ridiculous critiquing their solos. Of course they’re all gonna be awesome. That’s how they got on the show. But yeah, Russell was great. Except for that bit where he started to eat his shirt.

Couple Three: Contemporary/lyrical dancer Kathryn and contemporary dancer Nathan
Broadway with Spencer
White Christmas music!!! Such a great musical and so often overlooked. I’m gonna have to find a copy of that to watch this winter. This piece was really incredibly awesome. I loved the costumes, I loved the choreography, I loved the expressions and the technique. Just so good. And they did too have chemistry, Nigel. What are you watching?

Noelle: She keeps rolling onto the side of her foot when she’s in releve. Pretty sure that’s bad for your ankles.

Couple Four: jazz dancer Ellenore and contemporary Jakob
Quickstep with Tony and Melanie
Oh crap. Quickstep. Although, surprisingly (since Ellenore doesn’t impress me much normally), the footwork looked pretty good and their jetes were in perfect sync. That’s hard. Not that I would know. Yeah, I’d agree that they did pretty well, although I’d say it quieter than Mary did. Adam, it’s not that big a coincidence that Ashleigh’s partner and Ryan’s partner are partners now (was that really so difficult to understand?) But you know what’s pissing me off? Nigel. Stop thanking the choreographers for “bringing tap back to the program” when you’re the one who kicked off all three tap dancers in the first two (?) weeks.

Ryan: Oh, Ryan. I really don’t like him. I think he’s a cocky jerk, and I think he danced that solo like a cocky jerk, and he didn’t do anything cool.

Kathryn: I like her dress. And, ok, I know this is what they teach you to do and I used to do it myself, but I wish dancers wouldn’t ignore huge hunks of hair stuck to their lipstick. So distracting.

Couple Five: jazz dancer Mollee and krumper Russell
Lyrical jazz with Mandy (Oh! There she is!)
Well, this is gonna sound shallow, but I was wishing during his solo that Russell would take his shirt off. I see he heard me. Yes. Anyways. Mollee is absolutely incredible. Great extensions and, yes, she has certainly grown in maturity. I don’t know how she does it. She certainly stole the show. Russell stepped up, yes, but I also thought he was pretty stiff and nervous. It’s ok, though, because he’s hot too.

Nathan: that was really awesome, but I wish he’d gone with some different facials.

Couple One: Contemporary dancer Noelle and ballroom dancer Ryan
Smooth Waltz with JT and Tomas
Whoops, I didn’t write down one comment. That music was putting me to sleep. I don’t know a thing about the smooth waltz, but that was pretty. Certainly better than that hip hop monstrosity.

Ellenore: she is pretty fun and good at what she does. Not sure about the outfit, and she definitely should have been wearing tights.

Couple Two: Latin ballroom dancer Ashleigh and b-boy Legacy
Hip Hop with Dave
Oh boy. That was…not good. Not a good concept, not good execution. Just not good. Was that supposed to be a vampire-type thing? No, not okay. And there was certainly not great technique. Yeah, Dave didn’t give you complicated steps, but the two of you can’t even STEP at the same time? What is wrong with you? Not impressed.

Couple Three: Contemporary/lyrical dancer Kathryn and contemporary dancer Nathan
Rumba with Tony and Melanie
Wow, I really liked that. I’m sure it wasn’t technically perfect, but it was really fun to watch. And uh…I thought the chemistry was incredible. Once again, Nigel’s watching something else. And Mary. Whatever.

Legacy: how do his arms not snap off? And his head? Geez.

Couple Four: jazz dancer Ellenore and contemporary Jakob
Contemporary with Sonya
Oh, Sonya how I love you. This was brilliant in every way possible. THIS must be what my mom meant when she texted me “wow finally a great one.” Oh my gosh. So many things there looked impossible. Like when he was pushing her across the floor. How is that physically possible? She’s completely fearless and they both did everything to the fullest extent and, as Mary says, then some. And the emotion was flawless. They had absolutely no inhibitions and this was absolutely perfect. Wow. And, hey, the judges agree. Thank goodness.

Ashleigh (good luck following that…): and…yeah. Fail. Although it picks up a bit in the middle and then ends with more fail.

Couple Five: jazz dancer Mollee and krumper Russell
Jive with Anya and Pasha
Yay, more past contestants returning as choreographers! Jive was wonderful, and as Nigel said, it doesn’t even matter that they followed the brilliance of Ellenore and Jakob. I knew Mollee would rock it, and she absolutely did, although she lost a bit of steam toward the end there. Russell really surprised me by being so awesome with the footwork! And props to Mollee for being able to dance with that animal growing on her butt.

Jakob: wasn’t even paying attention. Whoops. I’m sure it was marvelous.

So, bottom three for each? Finally we’re voting for dancers, not for couples.

Boys: Ryan, Legacy, and uh…no, I can only choose two. Sorry.
Girls: Ahleigh and Noelle

See you tomorrow? I promise to actually show up this time.